Coco's Life

Cocoの好きなこと(レアジョブなどのオンライン英会話・旅行)の情報や仕事に関すること(家庭教師、塾、勉強法、看護学校受験)などを元教員の視点で語っています。

【自由英作文】日本の新紙幣に関してどう考えるか

Q:

Japan will get new banknotes in 2024. The new designs were revealed on April 9.

What are your thoughts on Japan's new banknotes?

 

 

f:id:cocodailylife:20190430151556j:plain

 

【私の英作文】

 

I'm looking forward to using new banknotes. I like the new design because it is superior. Foreigners will be able to easily distinguish each bill due to the larger numbers printed on the notes. The number of foreign travelers has been increasing, so I hope that the travelers will feel comfortable when they use the new banknotes.

 

By the way, I wonder why the Japanese government chose those three people because they are not very famous or popular.

For example, the current 10,000 yen note shows Yukichi Fukuzawa, who founded the Keio University. All of us know about his achievement well because we have learned about him at school.

On the other hand, those whom the government recently chose are not in our textbook. Consequently, only a few Japanese know about their contribution to our society.

 

Although I wish the government would choose more famous Japanese, I'm looking forward to the day when I will be able to have the new bills.

(162 words)

 

自信のないところ

  • distinguish each bill
    distinguishは英作文で初めて使ったので。eachはなんとなく単数形を取った気がするけれど、うろ覚え。
  • 冠詞の使い方、及び名詞の単数複数の使い分けがあいまいな点。

 

 

【レアジョブ講師による訂正】

I'm looking forward to using new banknotes. I like the new design because it is superior. Foreigners will be able to easily distinguish each bill due to the larger numbers printed on the notes. The number of foreign travelers has been increasing, so I hope that the travelers will feel comfortable when they use the new banknotes.

 

I'm looking forward to using the new banknotes. I like the new design because it is superior (1) to the previous ones. Foreigners will be able to easily distinguish each bill due to the larger numbers printed on the notes. The number of foreign travelers (2) coming to Japan has been increasing, so I hope that the travelers will feel comfortable (3) using the new banknotes.

(1)superiorを使うなら、比較対象を入れたほうがいいとのこと。

(2)日本に来る観光客のことを指しているので、そう述べること。

(3)分詞を使ったほうがいいらしい。

 

By the way, I wonder why the Japanese government chose those three people because they are not very famous or popular.

For example, the current 10,000 yen note shows Yukichi Fukuzawa, who founded the Keio University. All of us know about his achievement well because we have learned about him at school.

On the other hand, those whom the government recently chose are not in our textbook. Consequently, only a few Japanese know about their contribution to our society.

 

By the way, I wonder why the Japanese government chose those three people because they are not very famous or popular.

For example, the current 10,000 yen note shows Yukichi Fukuzawa, who founded (4) the Keio University. All of us know about his (5) achievements well because we (6) have learned about him at school.
On the other hand, (7) the three new people whom the government recently chose are not in our (8) textbooks. Consequently, only a few Japanese know about their (9) contributions to our society.

 

(4)固有名詞なので冠詞不要。

(5)「業績」の場合は複数形のほうが良い。副詞不要。

(6)ここは過去形で書いたほうが自然だそうだ。

(7)those whomよりこっちのほうがいいと。

(8)複数形。ourだし。

(9)複数形。theirだし。

 

 

Although I wish the government would choose more famous Japanese, I'm looking forward to the day when I will be able to have the new bills.

 

Although I wish the government would choose more famous Japanese, I'm looking forward to the day when I will be able to (10) use the new bills.

 

(10)haveよりuseのほうが自然とのこと。